Wednesday, January 12

The Story, part 1

I promised my adoption story last night, and here I am tonight to deliver. I suppose I will start where all things start, in the beginning.
Erik and I started dating in May of 2006. We moved in together in July. Yup, it was quick. We've pretty much been together the whole time either of is has been out of the house. Things were, well, as good as they could be until about December. We split for a few days that month. I foolishly ran to a mutual friends house (T, as he shall be known) as to not be home with Erik (in our tiny one bedroom apartment). Well, we all know what happens when you run to the mutual friends house. Yup, there was some hanky panky. This is something I am none too proud of. After 2, maybe 3 days of being separated, Erik and I were back together. T and I still talked off and on, and awkwardly T worked with me.
Fast forward to the end of January. Erik realizes I am late, and off to the store we go. I hadn't really paid it much attention as I have never had an exact cycle really. We were on our way to the local public library anyway, so that's where I peed on my stick. Three minutes in the bathroom, and two pink lines later I was pregnant. He knew just by the look on my face. We previously had 'the conversation' about what to do if we got pregnant. I advise everyone to do this, committed relationship or not. It made the next two weeks a thousand times easier, knowing that we had already decided on adoption before B ever even existed. Erik was scared the child was not his, but T's. I knew different, but that was a rec-curing theme throuoght my pregnancy. Actually, T got another woman pregnant near the end of my pregnancy.

The search started that day. Online, we requested dossiers from several adoption agencies, both local and out of state. We started our requirement list. Must have pets. Must not be independently wealthy. Must not be too broke to support a child. Must value a good education. Must have a large extended family. Travel didn't matter, cars didn't matter. When the dossiers arrived, they just felt wrong. How could I trust someone to raise my child just by these ten pages they had written? Most were photos of extravagant houses and tales of how they were stay at home parents, traveled all over the globe and just looked...entitled. No thanks.
Enter H. He was Erik's boss at the time. He was(is?) also Erik's friend. Erik went to him, in confidence, and told him that we didn't know what to do. This next part always makes me cry when I tell it. Sorry. H then told Erik how he and T had been trying to have a child for 7 years, that all they wanted was a family and that if we were considering adoption, they would be honored if we would consider them. I will never be able to explain the feeling, but when Erik called me at work to tell me that, I knew we had found THE family.

Ok, this is long enough for tonight. More soon!

With Love Always
Me

2 comments:

  1. Deb!! Your making me cry now0:)!! Your story is like myne but different! <3 yeah babe!!!

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  2. I want to hear your whole story one day!

    ReplyDelete