Thursday, March 3

Perspective

Ok, now that I am home I can write a whole post on this subject and maybe make it a bit more logical.

I have been attempting to read up on the baby snatch era, just so I knew about it, for a few months. Of course, learning that J was adopted near the end of that era (1980) has made it all hit home and made me both want to know more and less. Just reading the words on pages, that some of these children were told that their first moms didn't want or love them hit a different place than knowing someone taught these lies does.  I fully believe that the bmoms did love their children, but many were forced into placing. I think these kids (adults now) deserve to know this.
We have come a long way. We still have a long way to go, and some horrible history to make up for. Being from the south, there is a cry for reparations from slavery there. No former slaves are still alive. How about we get up in arms for people that are still around, like the babysnatch mothers and children?
I have never truly realized how lucky I am to have had such a choice in placing B. I am lucky that he will grow up knowing of my love. I want to simultaneously cry and vomit when I think of the losses that many, many birth parents and placed children have faced in the world of closed adoption. I cannot fix this and that makes me hurt as well.
Today I realize adoption is so much bigger, so much more than just me. It is more than any of us, but it is all of us combined.
Tonight I will hug my friend and probably apologize for all of the hurt he has endured. He will not understand, but it is a part of wearing the birthmom hat.

With Love Always
Me


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