T told me this morning that she wants nothing to do with me. I am still numb. She was under the assumption that I was going to take B back. I understand that she feels the need to protect her family. I very much appreciate it. I just don't understand how she could think I would do that to her for any reason other than an absolute last choice. Or to B.
I am now the enemy of my son's family. I don't even know how to relate to that. This was my response to her:
When I found out about the divorce I was scared, yes. I didn't know what was best for Blake. I never once said I was going to take him. I told E that if it came down to it, if the kids had to be split up for some reason, something dumb, that I wanted custody before he went to someone not family. He has been your son since the minute he was born and you know that. Yes, I miss him.Yes, it hurts still but I know with all of me that you are his mom, H his dad and his brothers and sisters just that. There is nothing I could ever do or say to change that and I never want to. Trust me or not, trust in that. Trust my love for that boy above and beyond anything I could ever want.
Her response? Well it will all be taken care of soon enough and it won't be up to you what is in his best interest. Did you honestly think that I would have split my kids up?
I said 'No, I didn't, but I was scared.' She did not respond.
My final message about ripped me apart to write, but it had to be said.
'If you don't want to hear from me I respect that, just know that I love you all and I will be here if you change your mind.'
I just don't know anymore. What did I do to deserve this, other than love B?
With Love Always